I’ve decided that when I’ve spent days (and sometimes weeks… because DNFs tend to take a lot more time) reading a book and have to give up on it, I want to give a quick explanation why. So welcome to what I’m calling a DNF report. It’s not a real book review but a quick report of why I had to call it quits and the time of death.
A Charming Crime by Tonya KappesA Charming Crime by Tonya Kappes
Series: Magical Cures Mystery #1
Published by CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform on June 3, 2012
Genres: Cozy, Paranormal
Length: 4 hours 52 minutes
June Heal has nothing to lose when she relocates her homeopathic cure shop, A Dose of Darla, from the flea market booth in her home town, to a quaint shop in the cozy but unusual little town of Whispering Falls, Kentucky. Or so it seems.
Cures and trouble...
Whispering Falls has a lot of secrets. From talking snow globes to whispering animals not to mention a few sprinkles of fairy dust, June realizes Whispering Falls is more magical than she thought. . .literally.
June discovers she was born into a family of psychics, and her homeopathic cures truly are magical. Unfortunately, they are not magical enough to save her from being the number one murder suspect when a member of the community that she had just had a disagreement with shows up face down in the lake with June’s lucky charm in the victim’s grasp.
And troubles double...
Add to that an attraction to her high school best friend, Sheriff Oscar Park and Mr. Prince Charming, her cat, is stealing charms from Belle’s Baubles, June is forced to clear her name in more ways than murder. After all, they don’t have cauldrons in jail.
I really thought A Charming Crime was going to be cute. I like small town dynamics and animal companions and magic and such. But A Charming Crime just didn’t deliver.
Why it didn’t work for me:
From the get-go there were things that rubbed me wrong. This is going to sound like knit-picking, but sounds were written out in italics and then also described. Like “meow, meow. The cat meowed.” I know, not a big deal but it bugged me and was prevalent.
But the real reason that I called it quits was that the storyline in A Charming Crime was just ridiculous. I can take a bit of humorous ridiculousness but it wasn’t funny to me. A few examples:
– the main character thinks about moving. A guy randomly shows up to her house saying he has buyers who want a home just like hers. To the T. And so he whips out a contract, she signs, and he hands her a check, paying her way more than her house is worth. Really? I mean… Really?
– a murder happens (its a cozy mystery) and the main character has a couple shocking moments. Both are not really written to make us feel shock though. Its like “so and so died. Oh and she had x in her hand. That’s not good.” Queue eye rolling. Except our main character is so overwhelmed she faints. Only to awaken, be told “we know this secret about you and its pretty unbelievable and confusing” and she accepts it completely, no questions. She just suddenly understands this big, confusing thing. And then for some reason that I was kind of unclear on, she faints again. Really?
– our main character is brand new to this town and way of life, but they decide she needs to lead this ritual. And what do you know, she knows exactly what to do – without any instruction. That would have been bad enough, but the whole ritual and the way it played out made me roll my eyes. And close my book. That was it. I was done.
Here’s the deal – I read a lot of paranormal and maybe I expect too much believability in my paranormal. If your okay with in your face obviousness you might like it. Although I will say I have no idea who murdered the lady – that mystery is solid and if I cared enough about the world or characters (not one stood out well enough for me to know their name) it probably would be satisfying.
So it didn’t work for me and I’m calling it.
Time of death: 50%